Learning to just be...

Meh. I'm forcing a type. Not because I have nothing to talk about, but because I'm being utterly and completly lazy. And that's just the God's honest truth.

The dirty 30.

Ha. I actually like that. I have officially turned 30 on Novemeber 24th. And you know what? I am utterly and completly excited about my 30's. I just feel like oodles and oodles of good things are waiting for me this decade - include FINALLY getting to my healthy weight. The 20's were hard. They were. They were full of difficulties to which I honestly think I wasn't "grown" enough to deal with. Or shouldn't have dealt with. Or wait, were they growing pains? Anyway. I can truly say the 20's for me were hard in hinsight; and quaite frankly I NEVER want to repeat them again. Nothing against them, but I don't want them. No thanks. But on the other side, the 20's were a time of tremendous growth. I found my career, my man, my home, my own mindset, and my own opinions. I can honestly remember how old I was in my 20's where I said to myself, "hey, I need to have an opinion of my own about this." And then that was that ;) I never looked back. I learned when to hold and when to fold. I learned how to say no. But more importantly I found myself...kinda. I accomplished more than the average in my decade of the twenties and I have truly impressed myself.
And now it's time that I start moving on and developing a plan for my 30's. However, I do remember a while ago back in the summer where things were quite raw here that I realized that I'm not that great at living in the moment and accepting things at how they are today. So that's my plan for the 30's. To live in the moment. To love life and not plan every single minute of every single day. Have fun knowing that I am smart enough to figure out when I need to stop and take a breathe and when I need to let my hair down. So that is my plan for my 30's...live in the moment and just be. And part of just being is accepting that I have to work at this healthy lifestyle thing. To be honest I really wanted to say healthy lifestyle crap. It's not as easy for me as it is for other people but that's no dang excuse.

So here I am. I sit. It is about making me happy this decade and doing things that are productive for me and not self destructive. It's about time I put as much effort into me that I did into everyone else and my goals like I did in my 20's.

I heard somewhere once that there is either love or no love. Love *is* unconditional. So there is no such thing as "unconditional love". It's either love or no love. period.

and it's time I start loving myself.

p.s. 50lbs in 120days....